We Salute You, Mister Complete-Trainwreck-Guy...
Grin, mother******Everyone in America is celebrating your firing, Isiah Thomas, as something that should’ve happened long ago. But where’s the praise? Where’s the acknowledgement of all you’ve accomplished? Everyone complains of “East Coast Bias,” but who in any corner of the country couldn’t enjoy the always-surprising train wreck that is your post-playing career?

From your start as co-owner of the Raptors, stirring up trouble by passing out free tickets and other merchandise to college players, you’ve made sure your stupidity was noticed. When you  were ran out of Toronto, you moved  right into the broadcast booth, doing your best to be as boring as possible. Hell, Bill Walton on the ganj’ seemed hyper next to you. NBC thought you were boring, and they’ve kept Pat Hayden and Pierre McGuire as analysts.

No, I will not come there.But what I think really sets your career apart from anyone else are the CBA years. Remember when you purchased the entire Continental Basketball Association, then the official d-league for the NBA, and decided to run it as a single entity? After slashing salaries and pushing out veterans, the NBA offered the league for a ton of cash, and you declined. Shortly after that, the NBDL was formed, and you couldn’t sell the joint to anyone. So you jumped for the Pacers’ coaching position, leaving the league to fend for themselves as they quickly went bankrupt. There are execs who have brought down teams, but how many have killed an entire league? An entire league! That deserves praise, Isiah. No one will ever be able to top that.

Then you spent the next three seasons with declining success with the Pacers after taking over from Larry Bird (whom you had said about his playing days, had he been black, “would just be another good guy.”) Bird came back, fired you, and the Knicks picked you up, making you Head of Basketball Operations. And here’s where your legend was realized. Number 1 media market, one of basketball’s premiere franchises, and the harshest media and fan base in the nation.  And you never stopped being controversial.

You built up the leagues highest payroll, you signed mediocre players to fat contracts, and you even traded two lottery picks for Eddie Curry. You brought in Stephon Marbury, an egotist who makes cheap, ugly shoes and who this year sat out about three months for “bereavement.” You brought in Larry Brown, and he couldn’t even take your team anywhere. Then your boss, James Dolan, fired him and forced you to coach the horrible team you put together. You did well enough to make it to playoff contention, earn a contract extension, and then tanked, making sure your legacy would not be spoiled.

Leering during your sexual harassment trial?But this season could very well be your career year. You started out with an epic sexual harassment case, with a woman that, by the looks of her , you were hoping for a slump buster. Not only did you (allegedly) tell her you didn’t care for those "[expletive] white people" or these "[expletive] season ticket holders," but you called her that fabulous five-letter curse word, and backed it up with one of the most ridiculous excuses while playing the race card. Then, after tying for the teams worst record, 23-59, you were finally fired.

So now everyone is kicking you while you‘re down. Some hate you because you should’ve been fired long ago. Some feel sorry for the poor dumb soul who will have to clean up your mess. But I choose to salute you in your ability to leave a path of destruction that no one will be able to top. Unless, of course, Britney Spears continues her career for another five years….
Posted: 4/19/2008 6:47:51 PM
Comments:
Hey ARK AFL. I don't know or care what race you happen to be. You and I both know that all your facts will be ignored, and you will be called racist for daring to put down a black man. How dare you!
Posted On: 5/9/2008 11:22:38 AM

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